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About Durban

Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!

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I love this town, even if it's small and full of quirks, like me. And trust me when I say, it's as gritty and unexpected as a line from that film. So if you come visit, prepare for a rollercoaster of oddball charm and moments so bizarre you’ll think, “Oi, did that just happen?!” Enjoy the chaos, and remember – life’s too short for boring streets and boring dates, innit?

Guesthouse owner charged with double murder after couple’s death in shower